|
| Hanson
Brothers Endorsements Gone Bad |
| 1. |
Guest
appearances with Siegfried and Roy |
| 2. |
The
Hanson Brothers sing the Hanson Brothers |
| 3. |
Spokespeople
for Prevention of Workplace Violence Center |
| 4. |
Honorary
Mensa Graduates |
| 5. |
Headlining
with Brian Boitano in the Ice Capades |
| 6. |
"Christmas
in Charlestown" singing and dancing show with Kathie
Lee |
|
|
| Most
Used Pick Up Lines By Moe Wanchuk |
| 1. |
Hi,
my name is Moe. I'm happy to meet you! Can't you tell? |
| 2. |
It's
cold outside. How about if I use your thighs as earmuffs? |
| 3. |
Your
place or mine or in the back room of the Palm Isle? |
| 4. |
I'm
a necropheliac. How well do you play dead? |
| 5. |
Nice
jugs. Mind if I touch them? |
| 6. |
Are
those little rocks under that blouse? |
| 7. |
No,
that's not a souvenir hockey stick in my pocket. |
|
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|
|
|
|
| Dr.
Hook's Offseason Employment History |
| 1. |
Expands
medical practice to include ears, nose and throat, not
just eyes. |
| 2. |
Male
prostitute serving the greater Syracuse area that is
known for his world-renowned stickwork. |
| 3. |
Head
butcher for the night shift at the local meat packing
factory. |
| 4. |
The
guy that puts sprinkles on the donuts at Gilmore Tuttle's
donut shop at mile 40 in Saskatchewan. |
| 5. |
Launches
Tim McCracken's Eye Surgery Centers in all Federal League
cities, business doubles when Bulldogs are in town. |
| 6. |
Used
tire salesman/book keeper at Ogilthorpe's Retreads and
Bail Bond Shop |
| 7. |
Founder
of the first open heart surgery walk-in clinic. |
|
|
| Things
You Should Never Say To A Slap Shot Fan |
| 1. |
Do
you know Lady Of Spain? |
| 2. |
Have
you ever palmed your isle, if you get my drift? |
| 3. |
Did
you use Downy on this? |
| 4. |
If
you did your cheek bones just right, you could look
like Jeff. |
| 5. |
Why
do you talk dirty? |
| 6. |
All
I have is some root beer. |
| 7. |
Gee,
that McCracken guy seems like a real nice fella. |
| 8. |
You're
too old for this movie. |
| 9. |
Is
that from the Joe McGrath Intimate Apparel line? |
| 10. |
Is
that Michael McCambridge behind you? |
| Contributed
by Chris
Zell |
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Hanson
Brothers Song List For Ice Stravaganza 2002 World Tour |
| 1. |
(Let
The) Bodies (Hit The Boards) |
| 2. |
You
Hit Me All Night Long |
| 3. |
Just
A Little Bit South Of Mo's Bedroom |
| 4. |
Songs
In The Key Of Camper |
| 5. |
The
Blood Remains In Stains |
| 6. |
Puttin'
On The Hitz |
| 7. |
I'm
Only Happy Giving Pain |
| 8. |
For
Those About To Fight (We Suture You) |
| 9. |
Killer
On The Ice With Stitches |
| 10. |
Hail
To The Chiefs |
| Contributed
by Chris
Zell |
|
|
| Rejected
Slogans For Slap Shot 2 |
| 1. |
Slap
Shot 2: At Least Our Writer Is A Man |
| 2. |
Slap
Shot 2: Hittin' Rock Bottom |
| 3. |
Slap
Shot 2: Continuing In The Fine Tradition Of Sequels
Started By Caddyshack 2 |
| 4. |
Slap
Shot 2: And They Said We Couldn't Make A Fourth Rate
Movie About A Third Rate Hockey Team! |
| 5. |
Slap
Shot 2: You Don't Even Have To Leave Your Home To Watch
It |
| 6. |
Slap
Shot 2: Remainder Bin, Here I Come! |
| 7. |
Slap
Shot 2: This Movie Is Horrible Looking |
| 8. |
Slap
Shot 2: Tough Decision - A Coherent, Well Written Script
Or A Creepy Gary Busey |
| 9. |
Slap
Shot 2: Newman, Baldwin. They Both Have Two Syllables. |
| 10. |
Slap
Shot 2: Yes, It's True, In 25 Years This Is The Best
Script We Could Come Up With |
| Contributed
by Chris
Zell |
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Why Slap Shot 2 Should Never Have Been Made |
| 1. |
It sucks. |
|
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